Preparing for Surgery

Moriah has her femur surgery in about two weeks' time now, and there is a lot to get done and prepare for. I am not excited about it, but I am excited to get my wife back. For years, we have been trying to find a doctor who would actually take a look at her leg, which was still broken more than a year later. I don't know if doctors were afraid of the issue or they just couldn't be bothered to look, but you can't tell me that after a year, there is any chance the bone will magically heal on its own.

The Weeks Leading Up

The last couple of weeks before surgery are always really hard, and not for the reasons you might think they are. Yes, the build-up is stressful, but most people's lives are stressful, so what makes pre-op weeks worse, you may ask? Well, for one, it isn't what will happen on the operating table, but what will happen after the fact. You worry that the surgery will not go well or that the surgery doesn't have the effect doctors wanted. So, the problem is not solved, but we now have added the problem of healing from surgery. I should probably hold this in because of the bad Juju that comes with letting this stuff out into the world right before surgery. However, I want to give everyone the real picture of what goes on in the calm before the storm.

There is also a boatload of things that need to be ready before the surgery. Some examples would be who is watching the dog, who is watching Mavrick? On the day of the surgery, we don't want to bring Mavrick to the hospital because then he could get sick! One parent is out of commission and a sick baby... I don't like those numbers, chief.

You also have to think about the little stuff too. For one, there is aftercare to think about! Especially when dealing with any major surgery. You definitely want to be comfy while you recover in the hospital. I feel like aftercare in the hospital really sets the tone for how recovery will go as a whole, so we always try to set ourselves up for success.

My game plan for after-surgery care consists of things like, what kind of of snacks do you bring? What blankets should be brought? Should we pack light, or do you play it safe and bring 3 full bags? To me, these are all critical questions for a happy surgery/aftercare. If you bring all heavy n' rich snacks, your stomach might not feel up to the task. Then you have food you can't eat! I don't know about you, but that would make me even more grumpy. The correct blanket is also very important because you want to be comfortable. You would think for how much they charge you at hospitals, you would be getting Prada blankets paired with some Gucci flip-flops, but alas, that is not the case...  

There is a chance things will get lost when you bring them to the hospital. Are you willing to take that chance? Knock on wood, we have not lost anything in the hospital yet, and we have been to a lot of them over the years.

While I can't tell you how to prepare your life for surgery, no, I don't know if your aunts and uncles will watch your dog. I don't know what the heck you will do with your kid. But I can give you great snack advice! That is something I excel in, and everyone has access to the same options, mostly.

The Snack Pack

So firstly, when it comes to planning hospital foods, there are three major categories to plan around:

• Sweet
• Salty
• Savory

I picked these three because, in my opinion, all other aspects of food are secondary attributes. If you get Twizzlers, you are more than likely getting them because they are sweet. If you are reaching for a cliff bar, it is because of the savory/sweet nature, and if you are reaching for crackers, you need some salt in your life! I personally have never craved a food because it was bitter, sour, tangy... I have always found the food appealing because of the aforementioned categories. I don't eat Sour Patch Kids because they are sour; I eat them because I want something sweet enough to make my mouth curtal. I don't want coffee because it is bitter I want it because of the much more savory taste it has in comparison to something like soda, and caffeine is going to be needed to help advocate for a loved one on 4 hours of sleep.

Anyway, back to the topic at hand. First, you will pick your favorite comfort food. It would preferably be something that can be stored and eaten at room temperature. Finding a fridge and or a microwave is a lot of added work for an already exhausting experience. I am not saying don't bring things that need to be chilled or heated, but you need to account for how much help you are getting, and if it is a hospital that you have stayed in before, how hard is it to find the needed equipment to get food ready? After you have picked a favorite food, you want to pick two more snacks from different categories so you have some variety, and there is almost guaranteed something you can eat regardless of how your stomach and mind are feeling. As an example, I would probably pick Twizzlers as my favorite snack to pack. Because Twizzlers are sweet and pretty harsh on the gut, I would pair them with some plain crackers in cause my stomach is out of it. I would also bring a cliff bar for when I need something with actual substance. Not only are cliff bars savory, but they also have a lot of protein in them in case I need to level out my blood sugar. As for the topic of quantity, that all depends on how long you think you will be staying. I would bring one of each regardless of length, and then any more days after that, bring one more of something for every day you are projected to stay. You will also want to prioritize your favorite of the three and bring more of that than the others. It is your favorite no one wants to run out of their favorite snack!

I know it sounds weird to put so much thought into food after surgery, but I strongly believe that in stressful times, focusing on what you can control is how you make it through on top. I know I will not be able to take Moriah's pain away and I know I have no control over the outcome of the surgery, but I can make sure that she is well taken care of after all is said and done. That means having all the means to do that, like snacks! Never focus on what you can't control. If you can't change it then don't try, but if you can then go for it. I can choose what foods to bring and make Moriah's stay comfy so I will!

Comfort Items

I don't care if it is an outpatient surgery or a month-long recovery stay. I think everyone should bring at least one comfort item with them to the hospital. It will provide mental grounding when needed. Sure, you could probably do without, but just like you could get to work without a car, the right equipment makes things a whole heck of a lot easier. Life is too hard sometimes to make it any more difficult than it has to be. My examples of comfort Items would be things like blankets, old memorabilia, and important pictures. I know for a fact that when Moriah goes into surgery, she will have her support stuffed animal and her favorite blanket. Would she survive without them? Yes, most definitely, but it is one of the minor things that we can control.

We really want to be trading out major things we can't control with minor things we can control. If I ever have any surgeries, I would definitely want a fuzzy blanket, my own pillow from home, and my Steam Desk (basically a laptop). Not because I think I would feel well enough to play the Steam Deck at any point or that the hospital doesn't have pillows, but the normalcy of having access to those items is very comforting to me. Do keep in mind that I do not recommend taking anything that is irreplaceable! Hospital stays are stressful and usually crazy; no one can guarantee nothing will get lost. In my example, losing my 500-dollar Steam Deck would be suck butt. It can be replaced, however, and at the end of the day, the likelihood of it getting lost as a medium-sized, priority item is low. I would not however bring my lucky 2 dollar bill as if I lost that, I would never be able to get it back! I was given that 2 dollar bill by my family, so even buying a replacement, if I can find one, would not be the same thing! I don't have a strategy for comfort items like I do snacks, but I can give some pointers!

• DO NOT BRING IRRIPLACEABLE ITEMS!
• Don't bring more than a couple of things. You will also have essential things to pack, and you don't want to drive a U-Haul to and from the hospital (I could see my mother wanting to do that just because it would be fun).
• Don't forget personal hygiene supplies, the hospital will supply you with some, but it usually sucks. You already have to sleep in a crappy bed in a depressing room. Don't settle for lower-quality soap and toothpaste as well!
• Always bring an extra phone charger. Losing the only charger or more than one person needing it could cause a war.

That's All

While surgery is challenging and never something you want to have to go through, whether it be yourself or a loved one, I think there is a lot to be gained from the experience. There are deeper positives to the whole thing if you look closely enough. For one, I think that trying times always bring a family closer together. I know that I would not be nearly as close to my wife as I am now if it weren't for going through a lot of tough times with her. The best swords are usually forged with fire, and I don't think that relationships are any different. Don't get me wrong, if you crank up the heat too much, everything falls apart, but the same is true with swords.

Me and Moriah have been through a lot together in our three years together and every time we go through something I always come out the other end loving her a little more and feeling that much closer to her knowing that she trusted me to get her through a very vulnerable experience. Relationships and marriage in my opinion aren't about any one single day or thing. They are about showing up and doing what you can each and every day. The minute you are not invested enough to do that is the minute it all comes crashing down. I will always be there for my family when they need me no matter what. I might not always be the most help but I will try my best at whatever it is and give 100% the whole time.

I hope you all have a great weekend. I don't know if there will be a post next week with the surgery falling on a Thursday, but I will do my best. as always, here is the quote of the week!

BYE!